It's a party.
It's loud and exciting but I can't find who I'm looking for,
I go upstairs.
Someone is using the shower so I sneak by into the bedroom.
The love of my life is pretending to be asleep there. As I open the door I can see her with her eyes closed.
She's trying not to smile as I silently crawl into the bed with her, I lean in close.
She makes a sound like a distressed goat.
I wake up.
My roommate has sleep apnea.
I knew that last month when I moved in. What I didn't know is that sleep apnea apparently means that my roommate will randomly start moaning like he's losing his anal virginity.
I glare at him for awhile, hating him for interrupting my dream about my ex. I look at the clock and see that it's 6:30 in the morning. I decide On a whim that I should go jogging.
I tell myself 20 minutes of jogging should be good.
What I thought was going to be 20 minutes turned out to be 2 minutes of jogging and 18 minutes of my body telling me to go fuck myself.
I walk along, spitting and hating myself for being out of shape when I spot an enormous spider web on a gate.
I stop to admire it. Thinking that perhaps witnessing this natural beauty is worth the pain in my knees and my shortness of breath.
This thought dies quickly as I'm one of those unfortunate people who mistakes bitterness and sarcasm for intelligence.
I'm almost back at the apartment. I decide to push myself a little, I figure that a touch of self respect would be worth the pain as I try to jog all the way back.
I pass another jogger. I try to smile at her, hoping for some sense of camaraderie,
hey friend you look like you have your shit together!
I too am one with my shit together!
She makes no eye contact as we jog passed each other, I guess she's to busy having her life together to notice me. I'm about 4 minutes from the house when I stop running to catch my breath again. As I walk up a steep hill I spot a worm crawling across the pavement I bend down to pick it up but it spasms and wriggles. I assure it I mean it no harm and pick up and put it in the dirt under a rose bush. I wonder if the dirt there might be too hard so I try to dig it up a bit. The worm ignores the little ditch I made for it and crawls under a little rose leaf. I get up and continue towards the apartment. Feeling a sense of camaraderie.